Discover the transformative power of humility in parenting as I explore the delicate dance of maintaining connection with my son. From apologizing without pride to challenging societal trends, join me on a journey of self-discovery, healing, and the profound impact of raising a child with compassion and understanding. Plus — book reviews of slow living nature books worth reading, and new books added to my current book stack!
I don’t think there is anything in this life that would keep me away from reconciliation and connection with my child. The more I reflect on the choices – and toxicity – of so many parents, the more I wonder: how could anyone let a relationship deteriorate so intensely and come to that point? When it comes to my son, I am completely humbled to my core. I am a melted pool of butter who is dedicated to his joy and his success. I see his accomplishments not as a reflection of me, because though he is biologically a product of me, he is his own soul and a product of his own soul expression, but rather as a light-expansion of his spiritual being. And it fills me with happiness and fills me with pride. I am helping him find himself, I am a sherpa to his journey through life, and I am filled with a sense of purpose when I see what he is able to accomplish.
But back to my original point in all this: absolutely nothing in this world could ever stand in the way of me maintaining this connection with my son, through all of his life. If something were to present itself, it would make me reflect on how I can be better for him. Because that’s what children do – they heal you. When something brings them frustration, sadness, or disappointment, it’s usually tied to healing the parent needs to do. It’s usually tied to behaviours or patterns that are not beneficial to the mutual growth of both souls in a parent-child relationship. And no matter the circumstances of life, the parent is the one who has traversed more of life and has gained the wisdom of experience, and the parent is the one who must use that experience to continue being a helpful sherpa to their child.
What I mean by this is that a parent holding pride (vanity/arrogance) in a parent/child relationship is one that is destined to lose. Children humble you, and if they aren’t, you likely aren’t doing parenting right (sorry, not sorry). No matter the circumstances of any relationship troubles that would ever arise between us, I would always be the first to let go of my pride and apologize. Always. Even if I feel, in my wisdom, that I was not in the wrong, I would never risk damaging my bond with my child over maintaining my own pride. And frankly, any parent who refuses to apologize in order to rectify a relationship they have with the soul they created chooses narcissism over their child, and has poor skills in conflict resolution. They value themselves more than their child, and are teaching their child that: me maintaining my pride over the sense-of-self I have created and am projecting onto the world is more important to me than you. And to me, that’s a complete misunderstanding of the purpose of parenting and bringing a soul into this world.
I would never ask or expect my son to apologize first or come forward first after a conflict, because I am older and wiser, and this what I should be teaching him. I will do that for him – humble myself in a way that makes me otherwise uncomfortable – because I want him to pass that down onto the next generation. The only way to heal the planet is to teach love and forgiveness and the best way to do that is, when you’ve been wronged or have wronged another, to come forward with humility and say: my pride is not worth the strife between us, how do I make this better for you? I value what we have more than I value anything else, because I love you and you are important to me and your joy is important to me. I choose you over my own arrogance – even if in my core I believe you were in the wrong – because I value you more than holding onto that belief. You are more valuable to me than me being right, if me being right hurts you and pushes you away from me.
I simply cannot imagine anything in the world being more important to me than my child and my relationship with my child (other than, perhaps, grandchildren – or so I hear), so I simply have a hard time wrapping my head around how pride could keep me away from it. Our children are not meant to submit to us, our children are meant to thrive thanks to us – and they thrive best with love, patience, and understanding – and our humility. And I don’t understand parents who would prefer to stay the victim than choose their child and bringing joy back into the life of their child, who would choose conflict and distance over healing and love. It is asinine to me.
The transformative power of learning to heal from your past lives is incredible. I never wanted to be a mom; in fact, I was set on a child-free life and got anxiety just thinking about the things I would have to give up if I had to take care of a little soul. Babies didn’t excite me. The thought of pregnancy filled me with a selfish fear. I worried about my books being touched, about my collector items being broken, about having to share my time with someone else. But then, as I mention in my book The Transformational Path, I had numerous past life regressions to try and better understand where these fears and this disgust stemmed from. It was only when I released all those karmic ties – with the help of my soul team – that I was able to also completely eliminate all fear and selfishness in this present life. It was like magic.
And now, my purpose and vision for life has completely shifted. Look: I have pivoted my spiritual work to solely focus on healing awakened mamas and mamas-to-be through various mediumship services such as spirit baby readings. If you had told me this five years ago, I would have laughed at you and asked you what planet you were living on.
When we drove by a beautiful, quaint café in Switzerland today, I looked at the folks sitting outside on the patio, drinking their coffees slowly, sitting with their books in their solitude. I used to do that; I used to go to the café with a book and spend hours there, immersed in my literature. It was one of the things I didn’t want to give up by becoming a mother. And I wondered: can I change the planet or heal the planet by sitting in a café in my solitude and reading (even if you are reading spiritual literature)?
You do change and heal the planet daily by dedicating yourself to raising a human with compassion, directing them down a path to contribute to the future healing of the planet. Motherhood changes the planet – every second of every day. Motherhood is soul-fulfilling, sitting in a café was peaceful and truly a glorious moment with myself, but it wasn’t fulfilling my soul to know that my influence in my house will ripple and impact the planet.
Things that are circulating on social media right now that I am absolutely irked by and hating:
– “Glimmer”: All this talk about “glimmers” (being the opposite of a trigger) when it was just a word invented by a writer in 2018 has become the new trend online. It’s yet another terminology that will become overused and will have people creating a bubble around themselves as an excuse to avoid healing. “I don’t need therapy, I have my glimmers and they make me feel joyful and secure.” The AMA writes, “a glimmer will have a positive impact on our mental health and wellbeing” — you know what will have an even more positive and, more importantly, long-lasting impact on your mental health and wellbeing? Therapy. Spiritual healing. Medication. To me, a glimmer is just another trendy avoidance technique – more grasping at straws by individuals who would rather the world change for them rather than them changing to change the world.
– “I’m not raising a Sephora girl”: This is circulating heavily in momfluencer communities right now and I detest it. I even saw one mom post that she’s raising a “feral girl” instead and how much better that is — while simultaneously showing her daughter practice shooting a target deer. I would rather have a planet full of young girls buying vegan makeup from Sephora than killing deer, personally. What this “trend” is ultimately doing is pegging girls against girls. Already we live in a world where it’s endlessly women against women, moms against moms – but now we want to sign our kids up for this competition? And instill in their minds that certain passions are superior to others? I thought our generation was trying to combat the idea of molding children to what we believe is the most acceptable? I thought that was trauma we were undoing by letting our children – especially our girls – adventure out into the world and discover their own passions and interests? Makeup is artful expression and we need people passionate about makeup in this world – especially for so many sources of entertainment we consume. I see nothing wrong with creativity, but I see a lot wrong with shooting helpless deer in 2024.
I finished Rewild Yourself by Simon Barnes and I’d give it four stars. What a beautiful book that was! I should preface this mini review by stating it’s written for a UK audience which is not completely applicable to me, but still relevant since I live in the EU. Barnes has created a text that is approachable for any novice or explosively interesting for any expert on how to find real natural wild beauty in the seemingly everyday mundane of outdoors. Some things are a little wild, such as encouraging searching for poop and poking around at it with a stick, and some items are simply impossible as a mom – especially a mom on a walk with a toddler. Nevertheless, other suggestions are really encouraging for making you excited about nature, even the “common” aspects of nature that we otherwise overlook from one day to the next. It was such a quick and easily digestible read that I’d recommend it for anyone wanting to open up that nature-sense a little bit more in their lives.
Here are some quotes worth sharing:
“But let’s say you have found the prints of a deer. Probably that day, or maybe the day before, a deer walked where you are walking now – and it’s a poor person who isn’t just the tiniest bit richer for such knowledge. It’s not just the deer that imparts these riches: it’s also the human pleasure of being part of a secret. You, with your sharp eyes and still sharper mind, have penetrated the mystery of the passing deer – and no one else knows, not even the deer.”
“It’s like the famous apple of Narnia: if you pluck it for yourself, it will bring only dark and terrible things; but if you pluck it for others, it will bring joy beyond imagining. If you seek nature for what it can do to improve your life*, you will have comparatively limited success. But if you pursue nature out of love, you will find a great deal more than you bargained for.”
*He is referring to the health benefits of nature, and I love this quote in particular because, like all things, I love when the intention of an experience is rooted in that energy: love. I know nature is great for you and being out in nature is great for you, that’s not the issue. The issue is how do I love it as it is; and this book really taught me how to do just that. I even found a dead vole on our walking path and the only reason I knew what it was – and why it was dead and still left behind on the road – was because of this book! (For the record: voles starve very easily and they have a pungent smell that deters predators from grabbing their carcass.) I am really planning to buy some binoculars.
I also finished Through the Kitchen Window by Susan Hill and I’d give it three and a half stars. This was a lovely little book with absolutely spectacular illustrations of a woman’s experience in a country cottage as she moves through the seasons. It was so descriptive, you could practically smell the cottage. It was full of little easy-to-do recipes and I’ve tagged a few that I most certainly need to go back to. It encouraged slow living and slow motherhood without the air of having to do more to achieve it. It also instilled in me a desire to really be aware of the seasonal changes outside my window and in my home. My one criticism is that it’s very heavily meat focused (even talked about the blood of rabbits on the table) which turned my stomach a little bit and made aspects of it irrelevant to my own experience, but it was cute and simple and I felt like I was in the cottage with Hill. Worth having on a bookshelf, for sure.
I am adding a few more books to my stack now that two have moved on out. I also received the last book in my birthday book purchases, yesterday. My “central book” will now be All My Wild Mothers. I picked this one because it merges a continuation of nature appreciation and understanding with slow motherhood content. In addition, even though it’s very thick, it has very short and easy-to-digest chapters. A friend on Instagram said I read books like they’re going out of style but the key to that for me are short chapters. If chapters are long, a book will drag for me. If chapters are long but broken up into other smaller subsections, that’s acceptable and I’ll still fly through it. The thing with short chapters is that after I’ve finished one, I tell myself, that was quick, I could fit in another one – and then that keeps going until I’m nearly done the book! I think All My Wild Mothers will fit the bill. Stay tuned!
I’m also adding the Tea Magic book as one of my “side reads” because it’s a tangible way to tune into the magic of plants. And, finally, the last book from my birthday books – Cozy White Cottage. This one I will flip through on the side, as well. It’s one-page home inspiration that will meet that cottagecore-passion side of myself.
We went to Nyon in Switzerland today (not to be confused with Lyon, France) and I love this little lakeside town so much. I didn’t have a chance to do my naptime writing, but I got a lot in this morning and I’m sitting upon our return and getting more done, now. While we were there, I thought to myself that the Rewild Yourself book really did end up working; I found myself noticing spiders crossing my path on the road, flowers blooming out of no where, and I was staring intently at birds (and feeding them) and wishing I knew their names — and wishing I had a pair of bins!
I believe this is where I will end for the day. I have also updated my self-portrait project page with a new photo. In addition, I want to remind any Awakened Mama who wants a feature on my blog and on my Instagram Stories that all they need to do is fill in the “interview” I’ve put together – come be a part of the Awakened Mama Community!
xx C
Awakened Little Souls 
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