Join me on a soul-searching journey as I grapple with the intricate balance between nurturing my creative soul, providing for my family, and avoiding the pitfalls of turning passion into profit. Plus, the revival of daily oracle card pulls—will it add joy or complexity to my slow living routine? Dive deep into the musings of a spiritual creative seeking alignment in a fast-paced world.

I have a few questions stirring around in my head today. First: how do I traverse the path of creative, find a way to turn my creativity into something that can provide for my family, while simultaneously ensuring that it doesn’t become work or traverse into something in authentic as a way to make money? And second: should I make oracle card pulls a part of my daily life, again – as a way to perhaps guide the conversation of this blog – or would that add another layer of complication or tediousness to my routine when I’ve finally started to settle into slow?

Addressing the first question, I am stuck. Which is why I ask it. I have a creative soul and it needs to be nurtured (and receives a lot of satisfaction through this act of writing) but I can sense in my spirit that it wishes to expand even further into something more consumable by others. At the same time, I don’t wish this creativity to become something solely for profit and I don’t want the goal of abundance to taint what is being created. I don’t want what I create to feel like work, but I simultaneously want it to help feed my family.

Perhaps this is the ever-complicated struggle of all spiritual creatives. In addition, I’m not entirely sure how to traverse to the next step of creating for others in a way that further benefits them. Here, I am writing for me – as a spiritual gift to myself – but knowing that authenticity is a necessary voice (especially in motherhood) and feeling as though there will be one (or two, or three) who read it and can connect with my sentiments. But again: I am a healer and I feel like a lot of what I do and what I am drawn to is not specifically for myself but to help the Collective. So how do I merge this urge that sits inside me (centered in my Heart Chakra but also rising into my Throat Chakra) in a way that helps others and simultaneously satisfies my soul-needs? I am navigating this, at the moment.

I think when I settle on an educational growth path this will help me better understand it. I know there is a book waiting to be written (every spiritual advisor has said to get-to-it) and it has the bones but I haven’t dedicated the time to it. It’s a channeled text so it takes a lot out of me and requires immense focus and dedication. I fear the energetic output of that project will not give me the slow, steady refresh that I look for when I write in this space. I don’t want the project to further deplete me while I am working to restore myself. It is an important book (it is not the first lifetime where I write it) so it will be born (eventually) but at this moment, it’s not that which calls me. I don’t think. And I’m not entirely sure how it would tie into the educational path I eventually pursue (I’m having a lot of difficulty settling on a course; nothing has spoken to me just yet).

My second question of the morning relates to an ever-present passion in my life: tarot and oracle cards. I have the most beautiful collection that takes up four shelves, but they often gather dust. Sometimes I go through waves of working with them – or wanting more of them. I don’t believe there is anything wrong with more guidance in your day; but would it be more work to add an oracle pull to my day? Another nub on my cog of slow that I am trying to turn? Would it be work rather than joy? Is the fact that I’m asking this questions a sign that I shouldn’t add it to my routine? Or am I fighting guidance from Source because it’s “more work” (lazy does not lead to manifestation)?

I was also thinking that my card pulls could simultaneously be beneficial to the collective. If I post those pulls here, it could become a daily reading for all. The card of the day for me – and my insight – could be a card of the day for you. Wisdom is not secret, it’s Universal. A message from Source does not need to be for one, it could be for All. Typing this out has had me realize that there could be an importance to this; it also helps me take a daily photograph which is a part of the challenge of Little Stories of Your Life that inspired me to begin this adventure in the first place.

I guess I’ll only ever know how I feel if I start. I can always stop? Let’s start, today.

I will pull from two decks: one deck I always return to, without fail – it is The Secret Language of the Light. The other is a more recent deck that I love for the imagery and focus, but the author does not resonate with me: Gateway of Light Activation. I am being told now that my disconnect with him is connected to his “misteachings” in a past life where I observed him (at a distance but not intimately) and that I need to release that and “offer him another chance to redeem himself” in this lifetime (but I have seen him transition through periods of ego which is why I feel disconnect in this lifetime in the first place). I’m hearing I need to offer grace. I’m only human; I’ll do my best to work at it!

12. Whispers – Tune in to your soul voice. Your mind and heart are expanding to hear your soul whispers. You are, or will soon, find it easier to interpret and understand the vibes of your soul through how you feel.

Two cards were stuck together:
Arcturian Light Codes – Evolutionary downloads. Recalling power. Future Thinking. You can evolve into a greater state of being now. This begins with how you approach even the most mundane of tasks in your own little universe. Show up in ways that you’ve never showed up before.
Solar Light Upgrade – Solar plexus chakra. Inner fire. Will-power. The light of the Great Central Sun is shining on you, activating you to push onward and create. This is a perfect time to move forward with projects, goals, and intentions.

Reflecting on this messages, I can see alignment with a lot of what I have discussed in today’s blog and earlier blogs. Clearly there is something on the horizon and it is coming from my soul, so I just need to be ready and open to receive it. Perhaps the answers and the clarity of this direction will come in the form of downloads (I need a physical journal to get those light codes, that can’t be done on a computer). And there also seems to be hinting there at the importance of my mindfulness in motherhood, about how I show up to this role, and about rewiring my mindset when it comes to approaching the everyday tasks in this vocation.

Did the messages resonate for you?

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Another question that has just arisen in my heart: How do I want my content to be consumed? And: How valuable is time as energy and what does setting boundaries do to relationships?

Starting with the first: when you create content and put it out into the universe, you are opening yourself up to exposure and vulnerability where what you have made or written will be taken, literally consumed by others (like food), digested, and regurgitated with their energetic input, opinions, or assumptions. I don’t believe I extend a lot of caution when it comes to sharing myself with the world, mostly because I allow myself to be authentic and open – spiritually – when I write (or create whatever it is I create). In this particular space, though, I have made an effort to focus on what brings my spirit joy.

Awakened Little Souls was made as a soul respite. It wasn’t made with the intent to profit, grow big, get noticed, become an influencer, or anything like that. It was made with the goal and vision of focusing on my joys in life: motherhood, and how I am walking this path, and where I am finding myself along this path. I didn’t expect my follower count to grow to nearly 600 in three months; that was a beautiful gift from the Universe and not assumed at all. I take it to mean that there is importance behind the voice and the words shared and that people need to hear it. I value the presence of every soul who is on this sacred journey of joy with me.

And so, returning to the question, I know that I cannot control how my content is consumed. But I can control the energy I wish it to hold and what energy people will digest as they consume it. While there may be moments that seem dark or gloomy, that is the reality of this path and I will not hide behind Love & Light; the foundational energy of even the most difficult of messages is that there is hope and that this is just one day among thousands. I want my content to hold an energy of community and I want it to bring souls together who feel called to walk the same spiritually conscious motherhood path, who want ancient wisdom to guide their modern choices, who see their child as a soul given on borrowed time and not a possession they need to mold and control. The work I do here is for the Collective, generations ahead; it’s an attempt to help humanity’s Ascension in a way that is rooted in my joy (being a mom).

Did I even answer the question at all? No worries, onto the second: time as energy. I have my joys and I make my joys known to the masses. I have my interests and my sources of wisdom and nourishment and I like to share these with others. I do not hide who I am: I share all that I am. This makes me a very particular person with a very particular set of skills, and this results in people reaching out to me saying, “Hey, wow, maybe you can help me! Can you give me some ideas about xyz?!”

Me, in my excitement to share my passion with others, I oblige – for free. In fact, my joy at the idea of being asked to share my passions makes this work a primary task in my life. I want to do it and get it to them as fast as possible; I want to make their lives easier while sharing a piece of me in the process, and I want to see how excited they are about what I’ve done for them; their joy (about my joys!) is my reward. So, I dive in deep, my heart is in it, I pass it onto them and… nothing?

No gratitude, no energy exchange, sometimes even a, “Nevermind, someone gave me an ABC idea and I’m going with that, instead!” This has happened once, twice, three times, (the first was pleasant, the three that followed was not), and now I am reflecting on it.

I have spent many days speaking to the value of time. I have a book on my shelf from the thrift shop called Essentialism which is apparently one of the best books for living a slow life. It talks about prioritizing our time and where we dedicate our attention. I haven’t gotten to it yet, but this situation has me thinking back to it (and maybe how it needs to come off of my shelf and be read). This is not just a situation of me using my time poorly, it’s a circumstance where someone asked for my time and the energy exchange for this time was nonexistent. I am of the belief that we should do things and give things without expectation, but considering this has happened three times – and each time, it has sucked the joy out of sharing my joys even more – perhaps I need to begin to set more boundaries with how my time is spent for others.

Money is an energy exchange, and for my work, there is an balance set there before I move forward with a session. But when it comes to moments like this, I dive into it with excitement because it is a topic and passion that invigorates me, but I end up depleted at the other end of it (and frustrated in the process). At the same time, I wonder, how do I just say no? How do I set a boundary without coming off as an a-hole? I once had a price on this passion but it also didn’t feel right so I removed the service; now I’ve done it for free for a few rounds without any energy exchange. It feels like an enormous waste of my time – time I have so little of to spend on my development, Alignment, and joys.

And I know there will be other moments where I am asked, “Hey! Since you seem to be an expert, can you tell me some XYZs?!” How do I phrase, I did this for others before and while I love doing it, I never even got a thank you so it made the task feel really depleting of my energy and so I’m setting a boundary and not doing it anymore, without coming off as a pretentious gatekeeper? I’ll have to sit with this. I know this comes off as cryptic and it’s difficult for you to even share your suggestions without knowing what I’m talking about, but I don’t want to call out people in the process of venting my frustrations.

Baby has been napping for an hour (his sound machine just went off) which means I have been writing for an hour. This is where I part in order to get some reading done and some lunch made before the grand re-awakening. We will head to the wonderful indoor playground in Switzerland, today. This time, I must be cautious of my age: crawling around all over the place was seriously hard on my back. I’m old, this is a fact of human life. I must accept it or my body will remind me.

xx C