Lions have always been one of my favourite animals. If you ask me to choose, I’m almost always quick to say lions – but llamas and alpacas are up there, too. I’m not sure where my preference of lions came from; I find them gentle, majestic, and I suppose I tie them to my love of Aslan from C.S. Lewis’ Narnia books.

When Jordan and I were dating and I had visited him in Paris during one of our long-distance moments, we went to Montmartre and I said I wanted to get a painting that would be our first painting for our first home together. I picked the purple and pink lion, painted onto sheet music. At this point, we also thought we might end up in South Africa (thank the heavens we did not) so it felt fitting as well. Lion’s are not a favourite of Jordan, but he was also drawn to the painting.

Now, when I look at this painting on the office wall – sitting between a photo of Jordan with R and me with R – I wonder if it was just a soul’s calling to my future: to birth a little Leo. Because R is a Leo Sun in absolutely every possible way, proving just how much of a lion he is, day by day. He is very much the embodiment of this painting: the cool, calm colours that represent the Crown Chakra and Ascension, but a ready-and-willing male lion, with his glorious mane, able to pounce if necessary (and certainly ready to play). And to top it off, he’s a lover of music. This painting really does feel like it was an omen for us.

The second painting I bought for our future home was a woodblock print of a glorious Raven – is that an omen for child number two? A raven was one of the things we bonded over on our first date, and our dog is also named Poe (after Edgar Allan Poe). Maybe child number two will be a mysterious messenger.

I often wonder how it is possible to love with as much intensity child number two as you love child number one. Every one says it just happens and your heart makes more room, that it’s unexplainable but just as powerful, and that it’s different but no less special than the first. Eventually I hope to also find out, but in the meantime, I’d like to cherish these moments with my son – just this unit of three – because it transforms every day and I learn more about myself, every day of the journey.

Today, it is raining. After over a week of sun and beautiful warm weather that felt like Spring was bursting through, it’s gloomy, gray, and spitting rain. The clouds are so thick and low on the mountain that it feels like we are living in it. I cannot see the mountain top out my bathroom window; it is completely cloaked by the weight of the sky.

It invokes an inner desire to stay “shlub” (that’s what I call super cozy and lazy), put on warm lighting, warm scents, and stay in. But – of course – R is feeling the complete opposite, today. He’s pushing boundaries with a smile and testing his limits of play. He’s all over the place and running around like a monkey. He’s being a bit of a brat and he’s looking to get laughs out of us. He will want to keep busy and keep active despite the gloom and I’ll have to adjust. Because that’s how motherhood works.

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I have always been a coffee lover. I don’t love it for the caffeine rush or anything like that, I love it for the taste. I love the taste of coffee and always have felt comfort in that taste. I went through a “tea” phase in my twenties when I was really in a “shabby chic” vibe of my life (which is like cottagecore meets English granny). I knew exactly what temperatures brewed the perfect tea (each leaf needs a different brew temperature) and for how long they should be steeped. I knew which were best complimented with milk and which with honey. I knew everything about tea at this point in my life because it became an obsession for me (as many things do; I call them “waves of my life” – my husband says it makes him think I have undiagnosed autism).

Anyway, I’ve reached an age in my life where my body cannot handle what it once indulged in. Spicy foods can no longer be digested and put me in pain for 24 hours after eating them. Alcohol messes with my spiritual development and makes me groggy (I haven’t had alcohol since June 2023). And caffeine gives me tremors, heart palpitations, and severe anxiety. While I used to be a three-coffees-to-start-my-day kind of person (out of joy for the flavour, let me tell you), I can now only handle one. I switch to decaf when I move onto the second.

But the past three days, I’ve been asking hubby to make me a tea: Intense Mint, it’s called. I only enjoy three types of teas these days: English Breakfast (black), Sleepytime Tea, and Mint tea (with no other added flavours). Herbal tea is not enjoyable to me; I find it gets sour-tasting very quickly (regardless of how it’s steeped) and the multitude of flavours is too much for me. Intense Mint – with both spearmint and peppermint – was my idea of tea perfection. So, after my decaf, I’ve been asking for a switch.

For the past three days, I’ve noticed that after this delicious tea, meant to relax and soothe me, I’ve been getting tremors, severe anxiety, and heart palpitations. Three days of tea, three days of symptoms. Wouldn’t you know it: the tea is not just plain ol’ mint — it’s green tea. 65% green tea, in fact. Green tea has more caffeine content than a cup of coffee. My body was warning me and it took three days for me to listen and make the connection. I’m still working off the shakes as I type this.

I believe that my body is rejecting the foods that I once could process without issue as a way to let me know that they’re not beneficial to my goals of Ascension and growth. This is actually spoken about in the book Nutrition for Intuition by Doreen Virtue (pre-Evangelical 180 degrees).

Doreen Virtue explores the connection between diet and spiritual awareness. Virtue emphasizes the importance of consuming high-vibrational foods to enhance intuition and foster a deeper spiritual connection. The book advocates for a plant-based diet, recommending organic and unprocessed foods to support physical and metaphysical well-being. Virtue also suggests eliminating certain substances, such as caffeine, alcohol, and artificial additives, to cleanse the body and enhance intuitive abilities. Overall, the book provides insights on how dietary choices can positively impact spiritual growth and intuitive development.

As someone who has made a conscious effort to eliminate alcohol since June, I have absolutely noticed the impact it has made on my intuitive and spiritual development, so keeping it out of my diet was a very simple choice. Perhaps this is a notice to do the same for caffeine – but I so enjoy that morning warmth and kick…

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More birthday books are pouring in; unfortunately one, a gift from a friend, was lost in the address abyss (I have moved so many times that my wishlist never seems to adjust to the correctly listed address and always seems to bounce back to something old). I think I have 9 still making their way to me over the month (two in the next few days and the other seven will trickle in from the UK).

This is the current stack on my side table, but it requires breaking down what exactly is being read and what is not (and my feelings about each, thus far).

The Wheel of the Year – broken into pagan seasons, so I have finished Imbolc’s pages (really spectacular and moving book).

The Wisdom of Birch, Oak, and Yew – have not yet broken into these pages.

The Wild + Free Family – my current primary read, absolutely nothing like I imagined but still meaningful (I will make an IG reel about this one).

Foraging With Kids – just browsing; primarily to save for when R is older (but I wish to experiment a bit on my own, as well).

Joy Journal – just browsing, still haven’t dove in to see what can be done with R at this age (thrifted find).

Tea Magic – super fitting considering what I have written above, still have not broken into these pages.

The Enchanted Life – started but was not pulled in, might have to reread the first pages.

Enlightened Parenting – easily digestible and really wise; one of those books I keep going back to, to break up the content I am reading.

Escape Into Cottagecore – beyond lovely, my little escape and fun read.

Thanks to Wheel of the Year, I discovered that the Black Madonna (also known as Lady of the Candle) is celebrated on February 2nd – my birthday. I had no idea! There are no coincidences in life, only synchronicities and confirmations from Source that: you are on the right path, we see you, we are here for you.

You may be wondering why this is a big deal, well, I wrote about the entire significance of the Black Madonna, where she’s located in France, Rocamadour, and how I ended up there in my book, The Transformational Path, but essentially, the name ROCAMADOUR was gifted to me in the most random way before my move to Paris in 2018, I went there on a whim, was told my life purpose, and also experienced my first clairaudient connection which has now become the primary gift and connection to Source in my life. You can tell how unexperienced I am with the gift in that old blog post. Now it’s become second nature to me, to recognize that I am a telephone for Source.

I think this is where I part. But there is sweet sorrow in that decision: I know that when I leave this blog and hit POST, when the morning slides into the afternoon and the exhaustion of time sets in, my inspiration and my joy of writing goes with it. I know that as soon as I close this space and click PUBLISH that’s the end of my meditative experience, my time with my soul, my time just for me. Yes, I have my books and I have my new-found joy in Pinterest and I have an evening that awaits me after baby goes to bed, but it is a different energy. And whenever I click to end this session scribing, I am always dreaming of tomorrow’s. It is truly special to me and has become a really important ritual in my day. I value it. I’m grateful for it. I am grateful for these mornings. For this space.

Grateful for you, who reads it.

xx C